The Way It Is, Sometimes It’s Hard

First off a couple of different shots of the Christmas morning sunrise.<br />n<br />n<center><a href='http://www.sarpysam.net/gallery/sunrise/morning12252005?full=1'><img width='250' height='188' border='0' hspace='5' src='http://www.sarpysam.net/gallery/albums/sunrise/morning12252005.thumb.jpg' alt='' /></a></center><br />n<br />n<center><a href='http://www.sarpysam.net/gallery/sunrise/xmas12252005?full=1'><img width='250' height='163' border='0' hspace='5' src='http://www.sarpysam.net/gallery/albums/sunrise/xmas12252005.thumb.jpg' alt='' /></a></center><br />n<br />nIt was a spectacular one yesterday. Hope everyone out there had the same.<br />n<br />nI hope every one had a great Christmas day. I did and I didn't. My Darling Wife is going to kill me for mentioning this but I get a little depressed on Christmas this past couple of years. It's somehow really strikes me how different my boy is on days like this and it just makes me a little sad. <br />n<br />nDon't get me wrong, he recognized the Santa thing this year and was excited about it in his own way but being autistic the excitement is different than what you expect. It was actually kind of funny on Christmas eve when we put milk and cookies out for Santa. He got so excited he didn't know what to do with himself and just ran around laughing and giggling in excitement. When he finally settled down he went to sleep pretty fast but he was excited.<br />n<br />nOn Christmas day though he was different. I recognized it, he was so overwhelmed by presents and Santa and Christmas day stuff that he didn't know what to do and got a little out of hand. I understand it all but it just really makes me feel sad that he doesn't see these days like normal kids do. He's different and always will be. I love him dearly just the way he is but I would like so much more for him and there is nothing I can do. That's what makes me so depressed. As a Dad I am supposed to fix everything for my kids and I just can't and it hurts sometimes. For some reason Christmas is one of these days it really affects me.<br />n<br />nOtherwise the day was fine. Good food and family fun. Everybody enjoyed their presents for the most part, beware of the Logitech MX500 Cordless Desktop, it's a piece of shit that is getting returned, but besides that everything else went grand. <br />n<br />nSorry to hang this out there on everybody but it's just something I needed to get off my chest. You know how it is, tell someone and it doesn't hurt as bad. Thanks for listening.<br />n<br />n<b>Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming the consequences of any misfortune. William James</b>